Four years after a traffic accident takes the lives of her husband and children, Rebecca Welling is still living inside the moment that broke her. Not because she cannot move forward, but because she does not believe she should. The grief has become familiar. The guilt, a form of loyalty. Each day, she replays the past, quietly betraying her own future while believing she is honoring what was lost.

When Rebecca cries out for answers, the universe does not offer comfort. It offers disruption.

Living in a deteriorating house that mirrors her internal collapse, she meets Joe, a traveling repairman whose arrival feels both accidental and inevitable. As the house is slowly restored, Rebecca is forced to confront the ways she has sabotaged herself, not through malice, but through fear, avoidance, and unresolved guilt.

Through unexpected lessons, physical labor, and a long coastal hike from Manhattan Beach to Monterey Bay, Rebecca begins to see a painful truth: that healing requires becoming a student again, even when pride and pain resist it.

Who Will Be My Judas? is not a story about loss alone. It is a story about the quiet ways people betray themselves in order to survive, and the moment when that betrayal must finally end.